A Tug at my Heart

Yesterday afternoon, Alice came up to my office. She is the girl hugging me in the picture on my blog. She poked around looking for candy or sweets. I was working on getting the new kids' pictures ready for display on our poster. Once in a while she pops by for a break to color or visit. Today, the first thing out of her mouth was, "I'm not happy. I wish God would take me up to Heaven now."

I did a double take while processing what I thought I heard her say and then asked what she said just to make sure. When I was right, I asked her to sit down and talk to me, but I was still not taking it as seriously as I should. I continued to work on my project. I looked up again to see if she was going to tell me what was on her mind and there were two streams of tears flowing gently down her cheeks. I put down my work and asked her to explain what was wrong. After a lot of crying and heavy breathing, I began to understand that her sadness was coming from the fact that her father does not come to see her. She has not seen him since she was very young and I am not sure where he lives. I do not believe her mother is still alive.

I tried to imagine just how hard each day might be for these kids at Challenge Farm, but there is no way I can. To think about not having parents who love me or not having them at all plus dealing with the abuse and life she has seen on the street goes far beyond my imagination. I can understand why she was having a melt down because if it were me, I would be having a melt down daily. Alice is usually very happy and playful. She is also a bright student. I did my best to comfort her. I told her that all the team members who have visited Challenge Farm, Mama Cheri, the staff, and even people who read my blog love and pray for her. Her response was, " I do not believe you." I am not a therapist by any means so I was at a loss of what to do. I told her again about all the people who love and care for her, realizing that this does not come close to filling the gap of one or more family members but this was all I knew to do. Most of all I told her that she is God's child and that He will always be there for her.

She began to settle down a bit. I gave her a yummy piece of fruit gum I'd brought back from the States and she broke into a small smile. I placed some brand new markers and coloring book on the table inviting her to stay in my office a little longer before going back to class. She colored for about 30 minutes and seemed happy. When she was ready to leave, she came over and gave me a big hug and told me that she loves me. Moments like this make living in a third world country very rewarding.